Trying Hard, and Letting Go: Flip the Coin.

Coin of Life_Aug 28 2014
“Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better.”  – Samuel Beckett
“Never, never, never give up.”  – Winston Churchill
“I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.”  – Thomas A. Edison
 
These quotes come to my mind as I think of work. The history of world, its evolutionary development, the uphill advancement has created the big window of hope as we keep trying.

 “I like thinking big. If you’re going to be thinking anything, you might as well think big.”  – Donald Trump

The expansion of the world also comes with the granting of increasing opportunities. We are allowed to dream big, and think big. Our world is determined to rub away the limits of boundaries.
 
And so we hope for better, and expect better. We begin to push ourselves more and more, as we are poured with seeds of belief that we can achieve the ultimate success in anything – work, relationships, and so on.
 
I see the equally large challenge for the quick widening ,as to the limited  stumbling space. While we are at loss by the constrains to grow, we can be as well confused by the free yet seemingly insecure/vague surrounding. Limitlessness at times gives me the feeling of darkness, and I am walking on thin ice with the small lamp of inner fire, yet the dark continues to eat up the energy, and I leave the zigzag trace without awareness.

It comes to me that there is an end of “trying our best”, as same as a coin having two sides. Where is the point of letting go? I become amazed in realization of the contrasting “rich and big limitless world”, and at same time the remained if not even more confusing question of – “The cutting edge of determination”. Letting go seems right at the back of “trying hard”, yet once you only lie flat within the bed of “trying hard”, you never gain a glimpse, let alone the shadow of letting go.

Sometimes we need a flip of coin, a stir, so that we can see the other side. The flip is not a smooth act. It can be small click as the changing Powerpoint slide, or big hit as the enormous waves of oceanic emotions. And then we are left to deal with the consequences. Who wants this risk of change? Rather than exhausting ourselves on facing the big stir, we would want to avoid and rather keep momentum of same old achieving.

The more we expect, the harder it is to let go. The world pushes us to the edge of bright-ful colors of future, and we become intolerant of returning to basic simplicity. Some says letting go is the act of giving up, and signs of failure. I come across with many individuals who are in the chaos of being muddled within the circle of fame, work or people, and still hold on to it. “If I leave it behind, I am nothing.”

For those who choose to let go, they go to the extreme other hill of “letting go”, and refuse to return to the sophisticated art of trying. “I only want a simple life. No more fighting. No more competition. No complication.”  They choose the “letting go” path, and try to stay on it. And they keep trying and trying, and somehow the act of trying resonates with the previous past of “Trying Hard”.

And that is the problem. We are embedded within the same one coin, and being influenced by the intertwining aura. We try hard, and let go. We let go, and try hard again.

This is is the conflicting and blending life.
Our complicated lives.

Perhaps that is the reason that our lives are never fully under our control, and it shouldn’t be. 
Because we human beings are subjective and biased. At many certain moments our judgments and beliefs become shirted to a narrow angle due to our experiences, and they change as we face the new and different chapter.

And the world is wholesome and complete, and so it leads us to live a balanced journey.
We learn to roll the coin in our life journey, and it travels along the road under the light, and leaves the beautiful diverging traces of shadow. Sometimes it stops and fall to a side, and we stay here for a while. Sometimes we need a flip for a change and it is ok. And then we carefully put the coin on track, and roll again.

 
I am willing to do it.
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