What is the ultimate freedom?
(To read more, please go to http://corimuscounseling.blogspot.hk/2014/09/the-journey-of-freedom.html)
The first immediate answer to freedom is probably “we do whatever we want”. Want Want Want. There is so much we want in the world. Young as a child, we thrust into the outer world with wonders and curiosity. The newness of surrounding leads us to hungrily absorb the different learning. We welcome all the possibilities, unfamiliarity and changes, awaiting for the blossoming moment of maturity.
And then years go by, our characters and attitude are saturated along with our deepened experiences. We develop into mature individuals with own personality and style. Yet interestingly often we find ourselves feeling more stuck than before. I recall a few scenes I have come across around me –
A man who came late to realize his dreams, yet being held back by the responsibilities of the families.
A woman who cannot find her true love, but always seem to break off after a few dates with someone.
Another person who feels stuck being in a place, but then think of thousands of reasons not to leave home and work in another country.
I believe that maturity can sometimes block us from the realness of freedom with our consolidated mindset and attitude. As we gain understanding of the formation of our “maturity”, underneath the accumulation of experiences and skills we have learnt to develop and sharpen, are the rich emotions we seldom flip through. Yet it is the emotion, not the logical skills or ability, which indeed drive our instinctive thinking and feelings. Happiness and satisfaction lead us to the greater confident and opened individual; pain and hurt lead us to the protective and defensive being.
And it comes to the main point, that perhaps the “stuckness” in maturity comes from our pain and hurt in the past. They make us take back our step with the heart on pins and needles. We no longer look forward, and instead focus on wrapping the more layers of protective coating to protect us from further hurt and pain.
And once we put on the protective shield around us, we are then blocked from being free. We continue staying behind the protection believing that the storm would pass, and we can be safe to change. Yet in the reality, the surrounding has always got hurt and pain, and we continue to delay our avoidance…
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