“Be angry. Irritated. Upset. Yet do not avoid the relationship, which can often be the worst happening in love.”
In relationships, there are the inevitable rows and conflicts we confront. Sometimes there is a solution, at other times we never arrive at the acceptable compromise.
Being uncomfortable, we may want to pause and turn away from the source of suffering. There are people who have beared the long years of family problem with the spouse and children, yet remain seeking love from the outside circle. Or while one passionately adore the other, yet for fear of the potential complications, he/she pushes the relationship away first. “If get hurt, then I betray first.” “If it ends, then I end myself.” “If it fails, I do not care first.“
This is not the way. To me, in whatever reasons, the act of transferring love to the outer circle, or pushing it away, is all a kind of avoidance of facing what it matters the most to the person. Avoidance leads the hiding from the responsibilities, conflicts and irreconcilable differences, as well as passing by the key elements of maintaining love in between – devotion, loyalty, embrace…
Avoidance has the destructive influences in ways no better than an abrupt separation/ending of relationship. Not only does it widen the distance between the individuals in the unexplained, uninformed and unresolved way, but also it creates the unreachable gap that no communication/interaction can be conducted. Without any contact, how can understanding of each other be possible? I say that under the zero connection, even the closest souls can drift apart.
Let us find the ways to conquer the fear of discomfort and problem. Face instead of avoid the relationship. Face the mattered others. Face the relationship. Because we treasure the relationship, we love, and so we act in accordance to it.
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